1.  Complete this analogy: strawberries and cream : Wimbledon :: mint juleps and burgoo :: ______.

I’m pretty sure this is the Kentucky Derby. I confess that I’m basing this solely on the juleps — I don’t know what burgoo is.

2.  What rock act is a duo made up two men, one named Russell, the other surnamed Russell?

I love this question, but I have no answer.

3.  Name the nutrient *and* the disease that both take their name from the Latin word “scorbutus.”

Let me recreate my mental riffing: Scor? Butus? Botulism? Scabies? Scabs? Scorbus? Ascorbic acid and scurvy — that’s my guess.

4.  The American Cancer Society’s Great American Smokeout event is held annually one week before what holiday?

Based on nothing more than dim memories, I think this is Thanksgiving.

5.  What future head of state, in office from 1945 to 1969, was a baker at Boston’s Parker House Hotel in 1913?

I like this question, too, but have no idea. Golda Meir doesn’t work, and neither does Castro, which are the two names that spring to mind unbidden.

6.  What 1678 work’s full title includes the clause “From This World to That Which Is to Come”?

Hmm. Utopia? Paradise Lost? The Divine Comedy? Forced to guess, I choose the latter, but I’m pretty sure it’s wrong.

7.  What unusual distinction is shared by these U.S. locations?  Amarillo, TX; Chimney Rock, NE; Greenwich, CT; Moscow, ID; Pensacola, FL; Sitka, AK; Wheeling, WV.

I have no idea.

He asks, I try to answer (without consulting Google or Wikipedia).

1. What lost its pink (representing sexuality) in 1978, and its turquoise (representing magic) in 1979?
Total guess, but I like it: the gay & lesbian rainbow flag.

2. What word, meaning “swift thief,” was coined by scientists in 1924, though it didn’t become popularly known until the 1990s?
My best guess is tachyon, but I’m pretty sure it’s wrong.

3. On what part of your body would you wear a homburg?
That’s a hat, so probably you’re head, unless you’ve got unusual hat issues.

4. Who was the only writer to have three separate works adapted into Alfred Hitchcock movies?
I was just typing “This is a great question, and I have no idea what the answer is” when the answer occurred to me: Daphne DuMaurier.

5. Who was the only one of the original seven Mercury astronauts never to fly a Mercury mission?
Process of elimination combined with the limits of my recall: Deke Slayton. That I remember his name at all is a testament to The Right Stuff.

6. What song title was a U.S. #1 for Rihanna, though it didn’t even crack the Top Ten for ABBA?
“S.O.S.” At least, that’s the only song title I can think of that’s common to the two of them — I’m surprised ABBA’s didn’t chart higher.

7. What unusual distinction is shared by these world cities (and no others that I’m aware of, but I may be missing some)? Amman, Jordan; Atchison, Kansas; Delhi and Indore, India; Istanbul, Turkey; Oranjestad, Aruba; St. Maarten, Netherlands Antilles; Tenerife, Spain; Thermal, California; Tirana, Albania.
Absolutely no idea.

He writes the questions. I try to answer them. Humility ensues.

1. In the U.S., “double black diamond” is the rating used for the most challenging what?
I have no idea. Whitewater rapids?

2. Who lived for years under the name “Mr. Thomas Howard” before his 1882 death?
My first guesses were John “Elephant Man” Merrick and then Hawley Harvey Crippen, but neither fits the death date. (And Wikipedia confirms I’m wrong.) No other guesses right now.

3. Potatoes provide the “aloo” in Indian aloo gobi. What vegetable is the “gobi”?
I had to think about this for a minute, but I’m pretty sure it’s cauliflower.

4. What two neighboring beaches in Rio de Janeiro each inspired hit songs, one in 1963 and one in 1978?
Ipanema and ? (And Ipanema is a neighborhood, so I may have that wrong.)

5. What novel was originally written under the title Elinor and Marianne?
I’m pretty sure it’s Sense & Sensibility. Now someone needs to write a masterpiece and originally title it Ginger and Mary Ann.

6. Whose 1937 death in Rome was observed worldwide by two minutes of silence over all radio stations?
Ummmmmm.

7. What unusual distinction is shared by these movies? Autumn Sonata, Broadcast News, House of Flying Daggers, Infernal Affairs, The Lost Patrol, Oliver!, Planet Terror, and Whore.
I was about to give up, then (for whatever reason) Whore dropped the penny: Each was directed by someone who had the same last name as one of the stars, but they weren’t related. Bergman & Bergman, Brooks & Brooks, can’t remember, can’t remember, can’t remember, can’t remember, Rodriguez & Rodriguez, and Russell & Russell.

Jennings writes the questions, I try to answer ‘em.

(FYI, I’m not submitting answers to the official contest, so if you give me answers in the comments I assure you you’re not helping me pad my score. If I want to pad my score I’d just go read the related thread on Snopes.com.)

1.  From left to right, what are the una corda, sostenuto, and damper?
I’m guessing they’re the pedals on a piano.

2.  By area, what’s the largest province of Canada?
Hmm. Quebec or Nunavut? I seem to recall it’s Quebec.

3.  On what planet did the bottle city of Kandor originate?
Krypton. (And shouldn’t it be “bottled” city?)

4.  Who also killed Countess Sophie on June 28, 1914?
The guy who killed Archduke Ferdinand, that’s who. Whatever his name was.

5.  What actress is the daughter of Vic Morrow, the actor most famous for his tragic death during the filming of 1983′s Twilight Zone: The Movie?
Jennifer Jason Leigh

6.  Electrical conductance is measured in “siemens.”  Previously, this unit was given the name of what other electrical unit, spelled backwards?
Eluoj? Mho? Tlov? Alset? Of those, I’d have to guess mho. Or maybe alset. No, no, mho, final answer, reveal that I lost a million dollars now, please, Regis.

7.  What unusual distinction is shared by all these things?  The Laffer Curve in economics, Miami Vice, the MRI, the NASCAR points system, the National Organization for Women, the song “One for My Baby,” Southwest Airlines, and the Space Needle?
Their creators all won Nobel Prizes. Michael Mann’s been to Oslo, right? Right? (Seriously, I got nothing.)

He asks questions, I try to answer.

1.  The family on TV’s Married…with Children was named in honor of what wrestler?
It’s going to be someone named “Bundy,” but not Ted or McGeorge.

2.  ”Theobromine,” meaning “food of the gods,” is the stimulant found in what substance?
Chocolate. Technically cocoa beans, I guess.

3.  What Best Picture-winning film was based on the short story collection Rope Burns?
Hmmm.

4.  Who spent 1994 stocking shelves for minimum wage at a Hy-Vee grocery store in Cedar Falls, Iowa?
Hmmmmmm.

5.  What peninsular nation is home to Al-Jazeera, whose name means “the peninsula”?
I can’t remember if this is Dubai, United Arab Emirates, or if I’m just completely off base.

6.  What did Emily Dickinson call “the thing with feathers”?
Hope. But not Hope Davis.

7.  What unusual distinction is shared by these famous people?  Diamond Jim Brady, Rosey Grier, Woody Guthrie, Howlin’ Wolf, Ted Lilly, Cristiano Ronaldo, Dwight Yoakam, and Andrew Young.
They knit! They costarred with Ray Milland as a two-headed man! Sometimes they call it a sliing blade!

Yeah, I got nothin’.

Ken’s questions. My guesses.

1. In 2000, who became the only two-time Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year?
Total guess: Michael Jordan.

2. What two U.S. states have capitals named for people who were executed?
Man, this is a good question. I’m assuming Lincoln was an assassination, not an execution, hence Nebraska doesn’t count. Hmm. Oh — Saint Paul, so Minnesota. And … North Carolina. (Curse Sir Walter Raleigh, he was such a stupid get.) Torturous, but this is the kind of question that rewards memorizing state capitals. Thank god something rewards that.

3. What did the Electro String Instrument Corporation change its name to, to capitalize on a distant relationship between its founders and a World War I hero?
Again I don’t know.

4. Which knight of King Arthur’s Round Table is Sir Lancelot’s son?
Ah. Sir Galahad.

5. Who appears, in front of a landscape of a different nation entirely, on New Zealand’s five-dollar note?
Sir Edmund Hillary, I presume.

6. What’s the only city to twice host a season of MTV’s The Real World?
New York, isn’t it? This is what I get for being a one-season fan. (San Francisco.)

7. What unusual distinction is shared by these actors? Alan Arkin, Emilio Estevez, Henry Fonda, Ian Holm, Milla Jovovich, Gary Oldman, Peter Ustinov, and John Wayne.
They directed themselves in movies? Mostly a guess.

It’s been a while since I did one of these, and I’m really squeaking this one in — past the submission deadline, before the next quiz comes out.

Quick premise refresher: Ken Jennings wrote the questions, and I’m trying to answer them using only the power of my own brain.

1.  At what city’s university, in 1745, did Pieter van Musschenbroek invent the world’s first capacitor by coating a glass jar with metal foil?
No idea, but I suspect I’ll be slapping my forehead when I hear the answer.

2.  What musician was born in 1965 as Richard Melville Hall?
Moby.

3.  What’s the only former Soviet republic that still calls its secret police the KGB?
Kazakhstan?

4.  What NHL team’s theme music is an Aram Khachaturian composition?
You’d stump me with “name an NHL team.”

5.  What’s the most common color of Reese’s Pieces, almost two-thirds again as numerous as the other shades?
Orange, I think.

6.  What was studied by Project Blue Book?
UFOs!

7.  What unusual distinction is shared by these TV series?  Cagney & Lacey, Columbo, James at 15, Kojak, Kolchak: The Night Stalker, The Love Boat, The Six Million Dollar Man, and The Waltons?
Were they spin-offs of TV movies of the week? Did Loretta Switt have to pass up a starring role on all of them because of her commitment to M*A*S*H? Were their initial episodes directed by Stephen Spielberg?

1. What flower symbolizes the throne of the emperor of Japan?
Hmm. Cherry blossom?

2. What’s the “predator” in the Nashville Predators’ NHL logo?
Hey, a sports question! I’m guessing: eagle.

3. What comes with two fontanelles?
A newborn baby’s skull.

4. In an unprecedented feat, the top 17 cable broadcasts of 2006 were all episodes of what program?
Aaaggghh. This is going to drive me nuts.

5. What country borders both of the world’s only two nations with square flags?
Good question, to which I don’t know the answer.

6. Who famously wrote the slogan “This machine kills fascists” on his guitar?
My brain wants me to answer “Johnny Cash,” but I’m pretty sure that’s not right. Further reflection: Woody Guthrie.

7. What unusual distinction is shared by these famous people? Billy Joel, Les Moonves, Demi Moore, Brigitte Nielsen, Kelly Ripa, Dennis Rodman, Salman Rushdie, and Seal.
They all appeared in Cobra! I don’t know, but I sure want to find out.

(Want in on the real thing? Visit the master’s website.)

Answering off the top of my head:

1. What TV show set each of its six seasons exactly twenty years in the past?
GAAH! This seems like it should be easy, but it’s not. My first thought was That ’70s Show, but I think they hovered in 1979 for a couple of years. Happy Days? No. I say again: Gaah! (A few days later, my brain spits out The Wonder Years. Yay, brain.)

2. In what city did Charles Lindbergh take his first piloting job, flying the mail?
Given his plane’s name, I’m going with St. Louis.

3. Where would you find a Zeiss projector?
In a camera? In a movie theater? I know Zeiss lenses are high-quality optics for cameras, but the projector part is throwing me.

4. In what 1945 novel does the “Battle of the Windmill” represent the Battle of Stalingrad?
No idea. Some novel that compares WWII to Don Quixote, I reckon.

5. What Asian nation was actually named for a region of Africa?

6. What organization was founded in 1939 in Williamsport, Pennsylvania?
Alcoholics Anonymous?

7. Name one of the recent Oscar-winning films that shares the unusual distinction shared by these movies: Batman Returns, Billy Madison, Fight Club, Five Corners, The Man Who Came to Dinner, Mary Poppins, A Prairie Home Companion, and Toy Story 2.
I saw Batman Returns and Toy Story 2 and immediately thought “sequels that outgrossed the original movie!” Then realized that none of the rest of these movies are sequels, so Return of the King would only be a correct answer by chance. (Later addition: I’m going with Happy Feet. I’ll explain later.)

This is a horrible week for me, and the temptation to google cheat is strong–but I’ll forbear.

These answers come off the top of the head and are not guaranteed (or even likely) to improve your performance in Ken Jennings’ quiz.

1. What magazine’s name can be produced by combining the name of the computer and the cat from the movie Alien?
Mother Jones

2. What Peanuts character’s last night is Reichardt?
I’m guessing Peppermint Patty. Or Marcie, but I’ll lean towards Patty. (Can’t be Linus, Lucy, or Rerun, since they’re siblings. Even if Snoopy had a last name, it’d be Brown. I imagine Schroeder is Schroeder’s last name, although if it is his first name he’s the obviously Germanic kid. Hm.)

3. What landmark was originally painted Galaxy Gold, Orbital Olive, and Re-entry Red for its 1962 opening?
The Space Needle. And it was re-painted those colors earlier this year for the anniversary.

4. What E.U. nation is led by a president and a prime minster who are identical twins?
Well, it’s not the UK. Or France, or Monaco. Beyond that, I have no idea. Portugal.

5. What kind of object is smaller than its own Schwarzschild radius?
An unusual one.

6. How many contributors did struggling Christian-themed TV station WYAH recruit in a 1962 telethon?
There’s got to be some reason the number would be notable, but barring a moment of insight, my guess for remains 1. (As expected, the “publish” button inspired a moment of insight: 700. Final answer, Regis.)

7. What distinction is shared by these letters of the alphabet and no others? C, D, O, P, S, and W.
They’re shared by the Cyrillic alphabet? Totally random guess.